Christmas Elf Jokes

Looking for funny elf jokes for Christmas? This collection of jokes about elves is sure to bring laughs through the holiday season.

All of the elf jokes on this page are clean and safe for kids of all ages. They are perfect for teachers, parents, kids and anyone with a sense of humor and Christmas spirit.

December is a great time to slip elf jokes into your children’s lunch box, pocket or school notebook. Just write them on a little slip of paper (or better yet, a Post-It note) and put them where they will find them (put one on the bathroom mirror every morning!). Christmas jokes are a great way to make kids smile, so check out our other Christmas Joke Collections, including Santa Jokes.

Some facts about Christmas elves: Christmas elves are small elves that live with Santa Claus at the North Pole and act as his helpers. A Christmas elf is often seen wearing green or red with large, pointy ears and pointy hats. Santa’s elves also help him make toys in his workshop and deliver them on Christmas eve.

Elf Jokes

Q: Why are elves so cold at Christmas?
A: Because it’s in Decembrrrrr.

Q: How many elves does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Ten. One to change the light bulb and nine to stand on each other’s shoulders.

Q: What do you call a greedy elf?
A: Elfish

Q: What kind of music do elves like best?
A: Wrap music.

Q. What is green, white, and red all over?
A. A sunburned elf

Q: What kind of bread do elves make sandwiches with?
A: Shortbread.

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Q: What do elves write on Christmas cards?
A: Hope you have a Fairy Merry Christmas.

Q: What was the elf’s favorite sport?
A: Miniature golf.

Q: What kind of money do elves use to buy things?
A: Jingle bills.

Q: Why didn’t Santa’s helper think he could make good toys?
A: He had low elf esteem.

Q: How long was the elf’s legs?
A: Long enough to reach the ground.

Q: What do elves like to eat for lunch?
A: Sandwich wraps.

Q: What was the elf allergic to?
A: Sh-ELF-ish

Q: What did the elf say to do on the computer so see Santa’s toy request list?
A: First, YULE LOGon.

Q: What was the elf’s favorite book?
A: Stuart Little.

Q: Why did the elf put his bed into the fireplace?
A: So he could sleep like a log.

Q: Why do elves like Dolls?
A: They can share the clothes.

Q: What do elves play during the summer?
A: Little League baseball.

Q: What was the elf’s summer job?
A: Short order cook.

Q: What’s the first thing elves learn in school?
A: The elfabet.

Q: What is big, green and carries a trunk?
A: An Elfant.

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Q: Who sings “Blue Christmas” on a toy guitar?
A: Elfis.

Q: What was the elf’s favorite desert?
A: Short Cake.

Q: Who lives at the North Pole, builds toys and rides in a pumpkin?
A: Cinder-ELF-a.

Q: What do you call a rich elf?
A: Welfy.

Q: What was the elf’s reply to the person who said they had Grandma for Christmas dinner?
A: Yuk – We had turkey.

Q: If there were 11 elves and another one joined them, what would he be?
A: The twelf.

Q: What did the elf say when he came across another elf while on vacation?
A: Small world, isn’t it?

Q: What are elves good at running?
A: Small businesses.

Q: What do you call an elf who tells zany jokes?
A: A Christmas Card.

Q: What do elves sing to Santa on cold nights?
A: Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.

Q: Why did the elf spell Christmas N-O-E?
A: Because he overheard Santa say “No L” when he walked by.

Q: What did Santa say to the elf who said he made the worst toys?
A: Don’t be little yourself.

Q: Why are elves such good house guests?
A: They only stay for a short tme.

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Q: What was the elf so quick to anger?
A: He had a short fuse.

Q: If baseball players get athlete’s foot, what do elves get?
A: Mistle-toes.

Q: Why don’t elves read long books?
A: They like short stories better.

Q: What’s did the North Pole school teacher call Santa’s helpers?
A: Subordinate clauses. (FYI: a subordinate clause is a group of words that has both a subject and a verb, but cannot stand alone as a sentence.)

Q: Why didn’t the elf want to share his toys?
A: He was too selfish.

Q: What was the elf’s favorite food?
A: Shrimp.

Q: Why did the elves ask the turkey to join the band?
A: Because it had the drum sticks.

Q: Where do you find elves?
A: Usually right around where you left them.

Q: Why did the elf do so poorly in school?
A: He had a short attention span.

Q: What did the elf get when he crossed a bell with a skunk?
A: Jingle smells.

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