Elf on the Shelf Jokes

If you’re seeing an Elf on the Shelf this year, then you have to try some of these funny Elf on the Shelf jokes.

The Elf on the shelf jokes on this page are clean and safe for kids of all ages. Great for parents, teachers, grandparents – anyone who is having fun this Christmas with their own Elf on the Shelf.

What is the Elf on the shelf? In 2005, a children’s book titled “A Christmas Tradition” explained how Santa knows who is naughty or nice – and it involves his elves. Years later, these same elves are finding themselves caught in people’s homes in mischievous situations…

It seems that the only time an elf on a shelf can move is at night – or when there aren’t any people watching. More often than not, they are participating in something they shouldn’t when morning comes around – much to the delight of the children that find them.

Funny Elf on the Shelf Jokes

Q: What was the name of the girl elf on the shelf?
A: Miss Chievous.

Q: Where did the elf go to school?
A: He was elf-taught.

Q: Why is the elf on the shelf’s favorite school subject?
A: Spilling.

Q: What did the elf on the shelf dress up as for Halloween?
A: Prankenstein.

Q: What did the elf say when he won the lottery?
A: Christmas be my lucky day.

Q: How do you make an elf fast?
A: You don’t feed it

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Q: What did the cat say to the elf on the shelf?
A: Meow

Q: Why does the elf on the shelf do such silly things?
A: Because he can!

Q. What is green, white, and red all over?
A. An elf with a sunburn.

Q: What was the elf on the shelf’s favorite Olympic event?
A: North Pole-vault

Q: What is michievous and visits the homes of youngsters living in the ocean?
A: The elf on the shelfish.

Q: What does the elf on the shelf use to write with on the blackboard?
A: Chalk-olate.

Q: How did the elf get to the top floor of Santa’s workshop?
A: He used the elfator.

Q: How did Santa describe the elf who refused to take a bath?
A: He’s elfully smelly.

Q: What brand of cookies does the elf on the shelf like most?
A: Keebler (made by elves with elfin magic)

Q: Why was the elf so cold on Christmas day?
A: Because it’s in Decembrrrrr.

Q: Why does the elf on the shelf want to sneak into your school?
A: To hear the ringing of the bells.

Q: How many elves does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Ten. One to change the light bulb and nine to stand on each other’s shoulders.

Q: What did Santa call the greedy elf?
A: Elfish

Q: What kind of music did the elf like most?
A: Wrap music.

Q. What is green, white, and red all over?
A. A sunburned elf.

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Q: What kind of bread did the elf make sandwiches with?
A: Shortbread.

Q: Why doesn’t the elf on the shelf get in any trouble for the mischievous things he does?
A: Santa’s too busy watching all the little boys and girls to see it.

Q: What did the elf write in Christmas cards?
A: Hope you have a Fairy Merry Christmas.

Q: What was the elf’s favorite sport?
A: Miniature golf.

Q: What kind of money did the elf on the shelf use?
A: Jingle bills.

Q: Why didn’t Santa’s helper think he could make good toys?
A: He had low elf esteem.

Q: How long was the elf’s legs?
A: Long enough to reach the ground.

Q: What do elves like to eat for lunch?
A: Sandwich wraps.

Q: What was the elf allergic to?
A: Sh-ELF-ish

Q: What did the elf say to do on the computer so see Santa’s toy request list?
A: First, YULE LOGon.

Q: What was the elf’s favorite book?
A: Stuart Little.

Q: Why did the elf put his bed into the fireplace?
A: He wanted to sleep like a log.

Q: Why did the elf like Dolls?
A: He could share the clothes.

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Q: What did the elf play during the summer?
A: Little League baseball.

Q: What was the elf’s summer job?
A: Short order cook.

Q: What’s the first thing an elf learns in school?
A: The elfabet.

Q: What is big, green and carries a trunk?
A: An Elfant.

Q: Who sang “Blue Christmas” on a toy guitar?
A: Elfis.

Q: What did the doctor give the elf on the shelf after he hurt his leg?
A: A Candy Cane.

Q: What was the elf’s favorite desert?
A: Short Cake.

Q: Who lives at the North Pole, builds toys and rides in a pumpkin?
A: Cinder-ELF-a.

Q: What do you call a rich elf?
A: Welfy.

Q: What was the elf’s reply to the person who said they had Grandma for Christmas dinner?
A: Yuk – We had turkey.

Q: If there was one elf and another 11 elves joined him, what would the last elf be?
A: The twelf.

Q: What did the elf say when he came across another elf while on vacation?
A: Small world, isn’t it?

Q: What was the elf good at running?
A: Small businesses.

Q: What did they call the elf who told zany jokes?
A: A Christmas Card.

Q: What did the elf sing to Santa on cold winter nights?
A: Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.

Jokes Continue Below ↓ ↓

Q: Why did the elf spell Christmas N-O-E?
A: Because he overheard Santa say “No L” when he walked by.

Q: What did Santa say to the elf who said he made the worst toys?
A: Don’t be little yourself.

Q: Why did the elf make such a good house guest?
A: He would only stay for a short tme.

Q: Why was the elf so quick to anger?
A: He had a short fuse.

Q: If baseball players get athlete’s foot, what did the elf get?
A: Mistle-toe.

Q: Why didn’t the elf read long books?
A: He liked short stories more.

Q: Why didn’t the elf want to share his toys?
A: He was too selfish.

Q: What was the elf’s favorite food?
A: Shrimp.

Q: Why did the elf ask the turkey to join the band?
A: Because it had the drum sticks.

Q: Where did Santa find the elf?
A: On the shelf.

Q: Why did the elf do so poorly in school?
A: He had a short attention span.

Q: What did the elf get when he crossed a bell with a skunk?
A: Jingle smells.

Q: Why didn’t the elf invite the snowman for breakfast?
A: Because he would eat all the ice crispies.

Q: What did the elf get when he crosses an apple and a Christmas tree?
A: A pineapple

Q: Why did the elf like Christmas so much?
A: Because of all the wrapping.

Jokes Continue Below ↓ ↓

Q: What do fish call Elf shenanigans leading up to Christmas?
A: Elf on the Shelfish.

Check All of Our Joke Collections Below ↓ ↓