Jokes About Pigs

Looking for pig jokes? Then you’ve come to the right place. Whether you’re a farmer, teacher, parent or kid, you’re going to find some funny pig jokes worth sharing.

We hope you like this great collection of jokes about pigs – they are clean pig jokes and safe for kids of all ages!

Fun Pig Facts: Did you know that, contrary to what most people think, pigs are actually quite clean? This misconception comes from the fact that pigs that live in hot climates roll around in mud to cool off.

Also: pigs are one of the smartest domesticated animals – and are actually smarter than dogs!

Pig Jokes for Kids

Q: How do pigs write secret messages?
A: With invisible oink!

Q: Which Star Wars character was really a pig?
A: Ham Solo

Q: What is a pig’s favorite color?
A: MaHOGany

Q: What do piglets do after school?
A: Their hamwork!

Q: What do you call a pig with no legs?
A: A groundhog.

Q: Why do pigs bring to the beach?
A: A surfBOARd.

More Jokes Continue Below ↓ ↓

Q: Why did the pig put a blanket on the ground?
A: To have a pig-nic

Q: What do you call a pig that’s no fun to be around?
A: A boar.

Q: What did the pig say when he got hurt?
A: Call the hambulance!

Q: What move did the karate pig like most?
A: The porkchop!

Q: What do you call a pig that wins the lottery?
A: Filthy rich!

Q: What do you call it when you cross a dinosaur with a pig?
A: Jurassic pork!

Q: What’s the difference between bird flu and swine flu?
A: You need tweetment for the bird flu, but you need oink-ment for the swine flu,.

Q: What happened when the pig pen broke?
A: They switched to a pencil

Q: What was the pig’s favorite book?
A: Hamlet.

Q: What do pigs call the creation of the Universe?
A: The Pig Bang Theory.

Q: Which sport was invented by pigs?
A: Mud wrestling.

Q: How do you fit more pigs on a farm?
A: Put up a sty-scraper

Q: What do pigs dress as on Halloween?
A: Frankenswine

Q: What do you get when you cross a pig with a scary dinosaur?
A: A porkasaurus rex!

Q: What did the pig say when the wolf grabbed his tail?
A: That’s the end of me!

More Jokes Continue Below ↓ ↓

Q: What do pigs do on nice days?
A: They go on pignics.

Q: How to pigs greet their parents?
A: With hogs and kisses!

Q: What kind of truck do pigs drive?
A: Pig-ups!

Q: What’s another name for the story, The Three Little Pigs?
A: A pig tail!

Q: What do you call a fake pig story?
A: A lot of hogwash.

Q: What instrument do pigs play in band?
A: Pigcussion

Q: What was the pigs favorite ballet?
A: Swine Lake

Q: What song do pigs sing on New Year’s Eve?
A: Auld Lang Swine.

Q: What sporting event do pigs hold every four years?
A: The Olympigs

Q: Where do pigs go after high school?
A: A school for higher loining.

Q: Where do swine go for vacation?
A: TroPIGal islands

Q: What do pigs put on pancakes?
A: Hog cabin syrup

Q: Who is the greatest pig painter?
A: Pigcasso

Jokes Continue Below ↓ ↓

Q: What do pig sailors yell when they stop their ships?
A: Oinkers Aweight

Q: What do you call a pig that drives all over the road?
A: A road hog.

Q: Why do pigs hand out on February 14th?
A: Valenswines.

Q: Why did the pig get arrested?
A: He was a pigpocket.

Q: What do you call a pig with laryngitis?
A: Disgruntled.

Q: Why was the pig ejected from the football game?
A: For playing dirty.

Q: Who rolls around in the mud and delivers cute baskets?
A: The Easter Piggy.

Q: How did the farmer know the goat was stealing eggs?
A: The pigs squealed on him.

Q: What was the pig’s favorite position in baseball?
A: Shortslop.

Q: What do you get when you play tug-of-war with a pig?
A: Pulled-Pork

Q: How do get a sick pig to the hospital?
A: In an hambulance!

Q: Which President was really a pig?
A: AbraHAM Lincoln

Q: What do you call a pig thief?
A: A hamburglar.

Q: Who was the smartest pig in history?
A: Ein-swine

Q: Which magazine do the 3-little pigs like to read?
A: Porks Illustrated

Jokes Continue Below ↓ ↓

Q: What kind of parties do pigs like to throw?
Sowprize parties!

Q: What do pigs use when they get a scraped knee?
A: Oinkment

Q: Why should you never tell a pig a secret?
A: They love to squeal

Q: Which actor do pigs like the least?
A: Kevin bacon.

Q: What do you get when you cross a pig and a cactus?
A: A porky-pine

Q: Why should you never share a bed with a pig?
A:They always hog the covers.

Q: What brand do trendy pigs wear?
A: Calvin Swine.

Q: What do you call a pig laundromat?
A:The Hogwash.

Q: Do you want to hear a clean joke?
A: A pig took a bath.

Q: What did one pig say to the other?
A: Want to be pen pals?

Q: What do you call a pig with three eyes?
A: A piiig

Q: Where do pigs leave their cars?
A: A porking lot.

Q: Why did the pig lose the race?
A: He pulled a ham string.

Q: Why are pig books so interesting?
A: There’s always a twist in the tale.

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