Jokes About Dogs

Dog jokes for kids and adults are here – including funny dog puns, riddles and knock-knock jokes that will leave everyone panting for more!

If you’re searching for clean dog jokes, then you’re going to love this collection.

Most kids love dogs and it’s hard to find someone who doesn’t love puppies, so we have some funny puppy jokes too.

Move over Rover! 45% of dogs sleep in their owner’s bed.

Fun Facts: Dogs are capable of understanding up to 250 words and gestures, can count up to five and can perform simple mathematical calculations. The average dog is as intelligent as a two-year-old child.

Dog Jokes

Q: How did the puppy handle his cold?
A: He licked it.

Q: What do you call a silly dog in Australia?
A: A dingo-ling

Q: What kind of dog can track down flowers?
A: A bud hound

Q: Which city do dogs like the most?
A: New Yorkie

Q: How do you catch a lost dog?
A: Hide behind a tree and make a noise like a bone

Q: What dog loves to take bubble baths?
A: A shampoodle

More Jokes Continue Below ↓ ↓

Q: What kind of dogs do vampires like most?
A: A blood hound

Q: Why did the dog stay in the shade?
A: So he wouldn’t turn into a hot dog.

Q: What do you call a dog with a fever?
A: A hot dog.

Q: What did the dog say to the flea?
A: Stop bugging me.

Q: What do dogs like for breakfast?
A: Pooched eggs.

Q: Why was the cat scared of the tree?
A: Because of its bark.

Q: What is it called when a cat wins a dog show?
A: A cat-has-trophy.

Q: What’s more amazing than a talking dog?
A: A spelling bee.

Q: What color do young doggies like the most?
A: Pupple.

Q: Where do pit bull’s sit?
A: Anywhere they wants to.

Q: How are a dog and a marine biologist similar?
A: One wags a tail while the other tags a whale.

Q: How did the tiny Scottish dog feel when he saw a Great Dane?
A: Terrier-fied.

More Jokes Continue Below ↓ ↓

Puppy Jokes

Q: Why didn’t the puppy chase it’s tail?
A: He knew it would be the end of him.

Q: What do you call a cold dog?
A: A Chili Dog.

Q: What would you get if you crossed a cocker spaniel with a poodle and a rooster?
A: Cocker-poodle-doo!

Q: What did the waiter say to the puppy?
A: bone-appetit!

Q: How can tell if you have a lazy dog?
A: It only chases parked cars.

Q: What happened when the dog went to the flea circus?
A: He stole the show.

Q: What do you get when you cross a sheepdog with a tulip?
A: A collie-flower.

Q: Where do dogs go if their tails fall off?
A: A re-tail store.

Q: What do you call a really cold dog?
A: A pupsicle.

Q: What do you get when you cross a gold dog with a cell phone?
A: A golden receiver.

Q: What dog wears glasses?
A: A cock-eyed spaniel.

Q: Why did the dog cross the road?
A: To get to the barking lot.

Q: Why did the Australian Cattledog cross the road twice?
A: He was fetching a boomerang.

Q: What kind of dog loves taking baths?
A: The shampoodle.

Q: What do you call a dog that meditates?
A: Aware wolf.

Q: What time is it when ten dogs chase a cat?
A: 10 After 1.

Q: What do you get when you cross a dog with a cheetah?
A: A dog that chases cars and actually catches them.

Q: What’s a dogs favorite kind of pizza?
A: Pupperoni pizza.

More Jokes Continue Below ↓ ↓

Q: What’s the only kind of dog you should eat?
A: A hot dog.

Q: What do you call a dog with a Timex?
A: A watch dog.

Q: What do you call a dog that sticks it’s tongue into an electric outlet?
A: Sparky.

Q: What does my dog and my iphone have in common?
A: They both have collar I.D.

Q: What do you get when you cross a bumble bee with a racing dog?
A: a Greyhound Buzz.

Q: What do you call a dog magician?
A: A labracadabrador.

Q: What state do dogs like?
A: New Yorkie.

Q: What do you get when you cross an Australian dog with a Beatle?
A: Dingo Starr.

Q: How do dog’s stop a dvd?
A: They press the paws button.

Q: What kind of dog chases things that are red?
A: A Bulldog.

Halloween Jokes on your Phone or Device

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