Looking for some funny polar bear jokes? Check out this great collection of clean polar bear jokes – they’re safe for kids of all ages.
These jokes about polar bears are great for teachers, parents, students, zoo staff and anyone who appreciates polar bears.
Polar bears are found across the Arctic. They are most abundant in areas with annual sea ice and productive ringed seal populations. There are five nations with polar bears: U.S. (Alaska), Canada, Russia, Greenland (Kingdom of Denmark), and Norway (Svalbard). Polar bears do not live in Antarctica. Penguins do.
Polar Bear Jokes
Q: What to polar bears eat for lunch?
A: Ice berg-ers
Q: What did the polar bear say to the penguin?
A: What are YOU doing in this half of the world? (FYI: polar bears live in the North, penguins live in the South)
Q: What did the polar bears say when they saw campers in sleeping bags?
A: Hot Pockets!
Q: What did the polar bear have stuck in it’s teeth?
A: Slow Eskimos.
Q: What’s a balanced diet for a polar bear?
A: A seal in each paw
Q: What did the polar bear eat after the dentist fixed its tooth?
A: The dentist
More Jokes Continue Below ↓ ↓
Q: What do you get when you cross a polar bear with a seal?
A: A polar bear.
Q: What did the penguin say to the polar bear?
A: Welcome to the zoo. (Why? Because a zoo is the only way they would see each other since they live in different parts of the world)
Q: What do polar bears like to eat?
Q: What are polar bears called when they’re out in the rain?
A: Drizzly bears.
Q: Why don’t polar bears like fast food?
A: Because they can’t catch it
Q: What do you call a polar bear on thin ice?
A: An ice breaker
Q: What has four legs and a flipper?
A: A happy polar bear
Q: How does a polar bear stop a DVD?
A: By pressing the “paws” button
Q: How do you keep a polar bear from charging?
A: Make it pay cash
Q: What do you call a dream in which polar bears are chasing you?
A: A bitemare
Q: What do polar bears like to eat in the cold?
Q: Why did the polar bear swim across the river?
A: To get to the other side
Q: What did the Polar Bear say when it saw a seal on a bike?
A: Meals on Wheels!
Q: What do you call a big mean polar bear heading your way?
A: Don’t call it anything – just run!
Q: What do you call a polar bear wearing earmuffs?
A: Anything you want because it can’t hear you.
More Jokes Continue Below ↓ ↓
Q: When is a polar bear not a polar bear?
A: When it’s in a grizzly mood.
Q: Why would polar bears be cheap to keep as pets?
A: They live on ice
Q: What do you get when you cross a polar bear with a rose?
A: I don’t know but I wouldn’t try to smell it
Q: Where do you find polar bears?
A: Wherever you lost them.
Q: What do you get if you cross a dishonest polar bear and a harp seal?
A: A bear faced lyre! (a lyre is a stringed instrument like a small harp)
Q: What is a polar bear’s favorite shape?
A: ICE-osceles triangle.
Q: What kind of hugs do polar bears give?
A: Bear hugs!
Jokes Continue Below ↓ ↓
Check All of Our Joke Collections Below ↓ ↓