These October Jokes are funny for kids and adults of all ages.
This is the best collection of clean October jokes anywhere for parents, teachers, adults and children. You’ll find October puns, riddles, knock-knock jokes and more – perfect for Halloween parties, Autumn and other things related to the month of October.
Some topics, events and dates in October to joke about include Hagfish Day, Baseball Playoff and World Series Games, High School Marching Band Competitions, International Coffee Day, World Vegetarian Day, National Taco Day, Halloween, National Apple Day, National Cat Day, and National Pumpkin Day.
October jokes have to include Halloween jokes – but we have thousands of Halloween Jokes on the Fun Kids Jokes website. That’s why we will only include some of them here. You can visit our Halloween Jokes Mega Collection for Halloween humor, including witch jokes, vampire jokes, ghost jokes, pirate jokes, black cat jokes, Batman jokes, dinosaur jokes, Mermaid jokes, Minecraft jokes, Harry Potter jokes and Spider-Man jokes.
October Jokes
Q: What month is best for a music festival?
A: ROCK-tober
Q: What did the girl say when it was snowing on Halloween?
A: Octobrrrrr.
Q: What do lawyers wear in October?
A: Lawsuits.
Q: Why do hotel staff dress up as witches on Halloween?
A: To provide the best broom service.
Q: Why were so many people suddenly being sarcastic?
A: It was the first day of the month of MOCK-tober.
Q: What month of the year gives Spider Man the most trouble?
A: Ock-tober.
Q: Why was Spiderman searching for Doc Ock?
A: For committing armed robbery…
Q: What did the hagfish say when it was grabbed by it’s tail?
A: That’s the end of me!
Q: Why did a scarecrow win the Nobel prize?
A: He was outstanding in his field.
Q: Why did the hardware store have a sale on deadbolts?
A: It was LOCK-tober!
Q: Why can’t scarecrows be the church musician?
A: They don’t have any organs.
Q: What was the scarecrow’s favorite fruit?
A: Straw-berries.
Q: How do scarecrows decide who should be head scarecrow?
A: They take a straw poll.
Q: What has no bones and catches flies?
A: A scarecrow baseball player.
Q: What do you call the feeling that you’ve had this coffee before?
A: Deja-Brew
Q: Which month is the best for investing?
A: STOCK-tober.
Q: When do Bavarians rip the sleeves off their shirts?
A: Octobervest!
Q: When do mechanics drink coffee?
A: When they are on a brake…
Q: How often do coffee lovers think about coffee?
A: They think about it a latte.
Q: Why did the coffee quit playing sports?
A: It always got creamed.
Q: Why don’t you draw straws with a scarecrow?
A: They might unravel.
October Jokes for School Teachers
Q: How do you fix a gourd?
A: With a pumpkin patch.
Q: What did the pumpkin say after thanksgiving?
A: Good-pie everyone.
Q: When is an orange not an orange?
A: When it’s a pumpkin.
Q: What was the pumpkin’s favorite sport?
A: Squash.
Q: Why did the Granny Smith apple cry?
A: It’s peelings were hurt.
Q: Why don’t vegetarians argue much?
A: Because they got no beef.
Q: Which car might a vegetarian drive?
A: A Volks-vegan.
Q: Why was the vegan runner kicked off the cross country team?
A: Because he avoided meats…
Q: What kind of apple isn’t an apple?
A: A pineapple.
Q: Who led all the apples to the bakery?
A: The Pie Piper
Q: If an apple a day keeps the doctor away, what does an onion do?
A: Keeps everyone away.
Q: What did the apple skin say to the apple who couldn’t afford bus fare?
A: Don’t worry, I’ve got you covered
Q: What sports star did Canadian pumpkins always cheer for?
A: Gourd-ie Howe
Q: What did the orange pumpkin say to the green gourd?
A: You look a little sick.
Q: What did the gourd say to the green pumpkin?
A: Why orange you orange?
Q: What do all winter squash have attached to them when they’re born?
A: An umbilical gourd.
Q: How do gourds get to so strong?
A: By pumpkin iron.
Q: What kind of gourd grows on trees?
A: Plumkins
Q: What Halloween candy is only for girls?
A: HER-SHE’s Kisses.
Q: What looks like half a leaf?
A: The other half.
Q: Why was the leaf shaped like a chicken?
A: It was from a poultree.
Q: What did the tree say after he made an offer?
A: Take it or leaf it.
Q: What do you call a military tree who doesn’t return on time?
A: Absent without leaf.
Q: What happens when a tree falls into mud?
A: It leafs an impression.
Q: What kind of Halloween candy is never on time?
A: ChocoLATE
Q: What’s the best thing about Halloween?
A: The day after when all the candy goes on sale.
Q: What food is crazy about Halloween chocolate?
A: A cocoa-nut.
Q: What is a young hagfish’s favorite game?
A: Slimon says.
Clean October Jokes
Q: What are ten things marching band directors can always count on?
A: Their fingers!
Q: Why was marching band practice so hard?
A: Too many notes.
Q: How are scrambled eggs like a losing marching band?
A: They’re both beaten.
Q: Which marching band musician wears the biggest sneakers?
A: The one with the biggest feet!
Q: What instrument do they only play in Boston marching bands?
A: Red Sox-ophones.
Q: What do hagfish use for money?
A: Sand dollars!
Q: What did one autumn leaf say to the other?
A: I’m falling for you.
Q: Why do trees try new things so often?
A: Because every autumn, then turn over a new leaf.
Q: If money really did grow on trees, then what would everyone’s favorite season be?
A: Fall.
Q: Why are trees so care free and easy going?
A: Because every fall, they let loose.
October Puns
Hope you have a fang-tastic Halloween!
Q: How can you find your way through a dark haunted house?
A: Use the lights witch.
Q: Why was there a big bowl of candy on the porch of the haunted house?
A: Witchful thinking…
Q: What did the corn say when he received a compliment?
A: Aw, shucks.
Q: What is corn oil use for?
A: Corn cars.
Q: How much does a pirate pay for corn?
A: A buccaneer.
Q: How is an ear of corn like an army?
A: Both have lots of kernels.
Q: What are Jack-o-lanterns afraid of?
A: Things that go Pumpkin the night.
Q: Why was the Jack-o-lantern so naughty?
A: His candle was wicked.
Q: What do vampires like to use Jack-o-Lanterns for?
A: They use them as night lights.
Q: How is a cat like a coin?
A: It has a head on one side and tail on the other
Q: How does a cat sing scales?
A: Do-re-me-ow
Q: What do you call an old Tom cat?
A: Grand-Paw
October Knock Knock Jokes
Knock, Knock.
Who’s there?
Candy.
Candy who?
Candy Great Pumpkin come to my patch tonight?
Knock knock.
Whos there?
Les.
Les who?
Les go pick some pumpkins!
Knock knock.
Whos there?
Aunt.
Aunt who?
Aunt you glad it’s fall?
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Felix
Felix who?
Felix-cited about Halloween!
Knock, Knock.
Who’s there?
Omar.
Omar live who?
Omar gosh, it’s October already!
Knock, Knock.
Who’s there?
Tyson.
Tyson who?
Tyson garlic around your neck to protect yourself from vampires.
