Whale Jokes

Looking for funny whale jokes? This collection of clean jokes about whales are safe for people of all ages.

This is the best place to find whale-related jokes online (Fun Kids Jokes also has lots of other animal Jokes).

Great for anyone who loves whales, sea animals, marine biology, oceans and science.

You’ll have a whale of a time sharing these funny whale jokes – perfect for parents, teachers, babysitters, grandparents, zoo staff, sailors – and anyone who likes whales.

Jokes About Whales

Q: What do you do with a blue whale?
A: Cheer it up.

Q: How do did the octupus make the whale laugh?
A: With ten-tickles.

Q: Where do women whales keep their money?
A: In an octopurse.

Q: What do you call a whale from Notre Dame?
A: A hunch back whale.

Q: What was Orca’s favorite game show?
A: Whale of Fortune.

Q: Who helps injured whales?
A: Sturgeons.

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Q: What do British whales eat?
A: Fish and ships.

Q: What time is it when a whale jumps into your boat?
A: Time to get a new boat.

Q: Where do whales sleep at night?
A: In water beds.

Q: What do you call a whale in kindergarten?
A: A little squirt.

Q: What do whales need to stay healthy?
A: Vitamin Sea.

Q: Why was the whale so sad?
A: It was a Blue whale.

Q: Did you know that whales can squirt ink?
A: Just Squidding.

Q: What kind of candy do whales like?
A: Blubber gum.

Q: Why don’t whales play volleyball?
A: Because they’re afraid of the net.

Q: Which type of whale can fly?
A: Pilot whales.

Q: If whales lived on land, which country would they live in?
A: Finland.

Q: Why did the two whales get married?
A: They were head over fins in love.

Q: What do you get when you cross a cow with a killer whale?
A: Sha-Moo.

Q: Do whales ever do things by accident?
A: No, they do everything on porpoise.

Q: Why do whales sing?
A: Because they can’t talk.

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Q: Why don’t whales do well on their report cards?
A: Because they work below C-Level.

Q: How do you make a whale float?
A: Combine root beer, ice cream and a whale.

Q: What did the mommy whale do when her son stayed out too late?
A: She flipped.

Q: What birthday party game do whales like to play?
A: Salmon Says.

Q: How did the whale get to the hospital?
A: In a big clambulance.

Q: Why did the whale cross the ocean?
A: To get to the other tide.

Q: What do whales use for money?
A: Sand dollars.

Q: How do you make a fish laugh?
A: Tell it a whale of a tale.

Q: How does a pod of whales make a decision?
A: They Flipper coin.

Q: What’s the biggest sea animal from Scotland?
A: Wales.

Q: Why aren’t whales afraid of pirates?
A: They like being made to walk the plankton.

Q: Why did the whale call a detective?
A: He saw something that looked fishy…

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