Kitchen Jokes

Looking for funny kitchen jokes? This collection of jokes about the kitchen and cooking are clean and safe for people of all ages.

We hope you’ll agree that this is the best place to find kitchen-related jokes online (Fun Kids Jokes has lots of other Food Jokes)

Great for anyone who loves cooking or works in a kitchen, including parents, cooks, chefs, bakers, waiters, restaurant owners and workers and, of course, kids!

You’ll find humor relating to kitchens, appliances, restaurant work, cooking and more.

Funny Kitchen Jokes

Q: What do people often say in a cold, Mexican kitchen?
A: Brrrrrrito.

Q: Why shouldn’t you tell jokes about peanut butter?
A: People might spread it around.

Q: Why shouldn’t you tell an egg a joke?
A: It might crack up.

Q: How can you tell you’re not the best a grilling?
A: Your family heads to the table when they hear a fire engine siren.

Q: What’s better as a nursery line than a kitchen dish?
A: Peas porridge in a pot nine days old.

Q: How do you know there’s a bad cook working in the kitchen?
A: Everyone is ordering Alka-Seltzer to drink with their dinner.

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Q: How might a parent know they’re a bad cook?
A: Their son invites the class bully to dinner.

Q: Why did the wait staff avoid the line cook?
A: He was always steaming.

Q: What do lousy chefs use to tell them when a roast is done?
A: A smoke detector.

Q: Why was the chef listed as the baseball team’s best base runner?
A: He kept running away with the hot plate.

Q: What appliance did the stressed out cook use too much?
A: The pressure cooker.

Q: Why was the appliance always late to the kitchen?
It was slow cooker.

Q: What was the church’s chef asked to put on all the sandwiches?
A: Miracle whip.

Q: Who is the most holy member of all the kitchen appliances?
A: The turkey friar.

Q: How did the chef win the golf tournament?
A: He got a hole in one using his waffle iron.

Q: Why did the judge want to borrow the restaurant’s kitchen?
A: It had a conviction oven.

Q: Why did the robber break into the kitchen?
He heard they had a bread making machine.

Q: Why didn’t the chef ever have any spare change?
A: He used it to park in front of the thermo meter.

Q: Where do tired, angry person go out to eat?
A: A rest-and-rant.

Q: Why was the pasty chef so annoying at the dance party?
A: He kept trying to cut-in.

Q: What’s the smartest way to clean a dirty kitchen pan?
A: Use a brillo-iant pad.

Q: Why wasn’t the baker asked to join the golf team?
A: He was a well known slicer.

Q: Why was everyone in the kitchen upset with the sous chef?
A: He kept roasting everyone.

Q: What did the religious sausage maker say everytime he made a fresh batch?
A: Braise the Lard!

Q: What can you always substitute for ice in recipe?
A: Frozen water.

Q: Where did the frozen food like to sit?
A: On their Frigiderriere.

Q: What did one pasta say to the other?
A: Penne for your thoughts.

Q: What did the chef give the person who asked for gluten-free spaghetti?
A: An impasta.

Q: Why was the pickle given the top shelf in the kitchen cooler?
A: The chef thought it was kind of a big dill.

Q: What bummed out the shredder?
A: Not being grater.

Q: Why couldn’t the new kitchen worker prep the carrots?
A: He thought the chef told him to slice with Sudoku instead of Santoku.

Q: Why was the new dishwasher fired?
A: The chef said to clean with spic-and-span, not spit-in-pan.

Q: Why was it so hard for the woman to order Italian food at Olive Garden?
A: She was at Olive Garden…

Q: What was the first thing Luke Skywalker said to the diners at his new restaurant?
A: May the forks be with you.

Q: Which famous chef always gets hair in the food?
A: Woofgang Pup.

Q: Who was the best young cook in history?
A: Julia’s Child.

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