This enormous collection of kid-friendly elephant jokes is sure to bring lots of smiles.
These elephant jokes are great for parents, teachers, zoo staff and, of course, children! All of the elephant jokes on this page are clean and safe for kids of all ages.
Fun Elephant Facts:
Elephants spend 16 hours a day eating 300-600 pounds of grass, leaves, shrubs, branches, and fruit. They drink 40-50 gallons of water every day and love to swim.
Funny Elephant Jokes
The best elephant jokes for kids of all ages are right here – clean, funny and ready for parent and teachers. Having an elephant party, then these elephant jokes will be great!
Q: Why are elephants such bad dancers?
A: Because they have 2 left feet.
Q: What’s as big as an elephant, but weighs nothing?
A: An elephant’s shadow.
Q. Why don’t elephants use computers?
A. Because they’re afraid of the mouse.
Q: How do you know if an elephant is standing next to you in an elevator?
A: By the smell of peanuts on their breath.
Q. What do elephants do at night?
A. Watch elevision.
Q: What happens when elephants get lightheaded?
A: They ele-faint.
Q: What’s the difference between an eggplant and an elephant?
A: If you don’t know, then I’m never asking you to get me any eggplant.
Q: What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?
A: Stuck.
Q: What is the elephant’s favorite Star Wars character?
A: TUSKan Raiders.
Q: What did Tarzan say when the elephants charged?
A: Look out – they’re coming right at us!
Q. What’s grey with red spots?
A. An elephant with the measles.
Q. What did the banana say to the elephant?
A. Nothing – bananas can’t talk!
Q: Why do elephants never forget?
A: Because nobody ever tells them anything.
Q: How does an elephant get down from a ladder?
A: He can’t – you get down from a goose.
Q: Where to do elephants like to sit when they travel?
A: On the trunk.
Q: What time is it when an elephant stands on your skateboard?
A: Time to get a new skateboard.
Q: What game do you never want to play with an elephant?
A: Squash!
Q: Why did the elephant stand on the oyster cracker?
A: So he wouldn’t fall into the hot soup.
Q: What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence?
A: Time to get a new fence.
Q: What time is it when an elephant sits on your sofa?
A: Time to get a new sofa.
Q: Why did the elephant lie down in the middle of the road?
A: To stop the chicken from crossing.
Q: What is the biggest type of ant?
A: An eleph-ant.
Q: Why aren’t elephants allowed on beaches?
A: They can’t keep their trunks up
Q: How do you stop an elephant from charging?
A: Take away their credit card
Q: What do you get when you cross two fish with two elephants?
A: A pair of swimming trunks.
Q: How does an elephant get out of the water?
A: Wet and wrinkled.
Q: What was the elephant’s favorite album?
A: Tusk (by Fleetwood Mac)
Q: Why aren’t elephants allowed at pools?
A: They can’t keep their trunks up!
Q: What do you call an elephant riding on the school bus?
A: A passenger.
Q: What do you give a seasick elephant?
A: A very big bag.
Q: What should you do to a blue elephant?
A: Tell it funny jokes.
Q: What’s weighs 2 tons, has big ears and makes toys for Santa?
A: Elfants
Q: Why do girl elephants wear pink sweaters?
A: So you can tell them from boy elephants.
Q: What do you call an elephant that won’t share?
A: Elfish.
Q: Where do baby elephants come from?
A: Huge storks!!
Q: What did the dog say to the elephant?
A: Woof.
Q: What did the banana say to the elephant?
A: Nothing because banana’s can’t talk!
Q: How can you tell if an elephant’s been in the refrigerator?
A: Foot prints in the pizza.
Q: Where do you find elephants?
A: That depends on where you lost them.
Q: What do elephants smell like after taking a bath?
A: Wet elephants.
Q: Why wasn’t the elephant allowed on the bus?
A: It’s trunk wouldn’t fit under the seat.
Q: How can you tell when an elephant is getting ready to charge?
A: It asks where the power outlet is.
Q: How do elephants talk to each other long distance?
A: On the elephone.
Q: What do elephants have that no other animals have?
A: Baby elephants.
Q: What time is it when you find an elephant on your car?
A: Time to get a new car.
Q: Which part of a tree do elephants like the most?
A: The trunk.
Q: What’s an elephant’s favorite vegetable?
A: Squash.
Q: Why did the elephant cross the road?
A: It was the chicken’s day off.
Q: Why are elephants always so broke?
A: Because they work for peanuts.
Q: What’s big and grey and keeps you dry in the rain?
A: An umbrellaphant.
Q: How do you make an elephant float?
A: One scoop of ice cream, root beer soda, and an elephant.
Q: What do you do with a green elephant?
A: Let it ripen.
Q: What kind of elephants live at the North Pole?
A: Really cold ones.
Q: How do you get down off an elephant?
A: You don’t, you get down off a duck.
Q: How is an elephant like a banana?
A: They’re both grey. Well… except the banana.
Q: What’s the difference between an African elephant and an Asian elephant?
A: About 5,000 miles.
Q: What did the peanut say to the elephant?
A: Nothing – peanuts can’t talk.
Q: How do you raise a baby elephant?
A: A fork lift.
Q: How do you catch an elephant?
A: Act like a peanut.
Q: Why don’t African elephants like to play Go Fish?
A: Too many cheetahs.
Q: What happened to the elephant who ran away with the circus?
A: The police made him bring it back.
Q: How can you tell if an elephant is in the refrigerator?
A: The door won’t close.
Q. Why do elephants need trunks?
A. Because they don’t have handbags.
Q: What the difference between a herd of elephants and a bushel of red delicious apples?
A: Apples are red.
Q: Why are elephants so wrinkled?
A: Because it takes too long to iron them.
Q: How do you keep an elephant from charging?
A: You take away its credit cards.
Q: How do you keep an elephant from charging?
A: You take away its power adapter.
Q: What’s the best thing to do if an elephant sneezes?
A: Get out of the way.
Q: What do you do with a blue elephant?
A: Tell it funny jokes.
Q: Why did the elephant cross the road?
A: It was the chicken’s day off.
Q: What is big, grey and has a lot of red dots?
A: An elephant in a thorn bush.
Q: What time is it when five elephants are chasing you?
A: Five after one.
Q: What wears glass slippers and weighs over 2 tons?
A: Cinder-elephant.
Q: What was the elephant’s favorite sport?
A: Squash!
Q: Why did the elephant sit on the marshmallow?
A: So it wouldn’t fall into the hot cocoa.
Q: Why couldn’t the 2 elephants go swimming together?
A: Because they only had 1 pair of trunks.
Q: How do you get down from an elephant?
A: You don’t. You get down from geese.
