Basketball Jokes

Looking for basketball jokes?

This is the best collection of jokes about basketball you’ll find anywhere.

Not only are these basketball jokes a slam dunk, but they are clean and safe for kids of all ages.

These basketball jokes are especially great for parents, basketball coaches, gym teachers and basketball players – but the are fun for everyone who enjoys watching or playing basketball.

If you’re coaching kids who love basketball, or you’re teaching a basketball segment in gym class, then print these out or write them down and keep them on your clipboard. It’s a great way to get your players or students in a fun mood.

Funny Basketball Jokes

Q: Why did the basketball player sign up for the crafting club?
A: He wanted to learn how to make baskets!

Q: How do basketball players stay cool during a game?
A: They stand near the fans.

Q: Who was known as the poet of basketball?
A: Longfellow.

Q: Why can’t you play a fair basketball game in the jungle?
A: Too many cheetahs.

Q: Where do point guards take their sweethearts to dance?
A: Basket balls.

More Jokes Continue Below ↓ ↓

A basketball riddle: Two basketball teams play a game. The home team ends up winning, but not a single man from either team scored a basket. How can this be? They were women’s basketball teams!

Q: Why violation do ghosts get called for the most in basketball?
A: Ghoul tending.

Q: What kind of basketball team cries when it loses?
A: A bawl club.

Q: What do basketball players call the first meal of the day?
A: Fast breaks.

Q: What was the lacrosse player’s favorite type of car?
A: A dodge.

Q: Where do basketball players get their uniforms?
A: New Jersey

Q: What happens to basketball players who go blind?
A: They become referees.

Q: Why couldn’t the basketball player listen to his music?
A: Because he broke a record.

Q: Why are basketball players messy eaters?
A: They’re always dribbling.

Q: What do you call a person who walks back and forth screaming one minute, then sits down weeping uncontrollably the next?
A: A basketball coach

Q: Why do basketball players love donuts?
A: They love to dunk them.

Q: What do you call a pig who never passes the basketball?
A: A ball hog.

More Jokes Continue Below ↓ ↓

Q: Why didn’t the lousy basketball team have a website?
A: They can’t string three W’s together.

Q: Why can’t you play basketball with pigs?
A: They hog the ball.

Q: Why is basketball the yuckiest sport?
A: The players dribble all over the court.

Q: Why are scrambled eggs like a losing basketball team?
A: Because they’ve both been beaten.

Q: What do you call a pig playing basketball?
A: A ball hog.

Q: Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?
A: She ran away from the ball.

Q: Why did the basketball player sit on the bench doodling pictures of chickens?
A: He was asked by the coach to draw fowls (fouls).

Q: Why did the basketball player go to jail?
A: Because he shot the ball.

Q: What’s the difference between a basketball player and a dog?
A: One dribbles, the other drools.

Q: What kind of stories are told by basketball players?
A: Tall Tales.

Q: Why are babies good at basketball?
A: Because they’re always dribbling.

Still More Jokes Below ↓ ↓

Q: What time is it when a basketball team chases a baseball team?
A: Five after nine. (9:05)

Q: What did March say to the madness?
A: What’s all that bracket?

Q: What’s the difference between a ball hog and time?
A: Time passes.

Q: Why are college basketball players so excited to make it to the last hole in golf?
A: They love the final fore.

Q: Which basketball player wears the biggest sneakers?
A: The one with the biggest feet!

Q: What did the bumble bee say after making a foul shot?
A: Hive scored

Q: Why did the chicken get ejected from the basketball game?
A: For persistent fowl play.

More Jokes Continue Below ↓ ↓

Hanging in the trophy chest at the High School were basketball team photos from past school teams. A player in each photo held a basketball identifying the year – 72-73, 73-74, 74-75, etc.. One day, a freshman was looking curiously at the photos. Turning to a teacher, he said, “Isn’t it wierd how every team lost by just one point?”

Q: Why was Cinderella such a poor basketball player?
A: Her coach was a pumpkin.

Q: What do you call an unbelievable story about a basketball player?
A: A tall tale.

Q: What did the announcer say about the team that kept losing?
A: They’re a team in transition – they’re going from bad to worse.

Q: In what sport is a basket filled but never gets full?
A: Basketball.

Q: Why do basketball players love cookies?
A: Because they can dunk them.

Q: Where do basketball players always get their coffee?
A: Dunkin’ Donuts

Q: Who is the best basketball player in the Hundred Acre Wood?
A: Tigger because he loves to bounce!

Halloween Jokes on your Phone or Device

Never search for clean Halloween jokes again – Download them now instead. Get EVERY Halloween joke you’ll ever need right now and access them anytime on your PC, phone, tablet, Kindle or other device – forever! #1 for Parents and Teachers! Great for parties, events, cards and trick-or-treating. Plus you’ll get a fun bonus – Halloween Lunch Box Jokes Printable (30+ Days of Jokes).